Jordo Media RSS / Atom Feed Directory

[Editor's note: I was commissioned by the fine folks of premiere travel magazine Panama 980 to write about the more-offbeat side of Panama City's nightlife. You can check out the article with exclusive pictures of all the sites I visited in the July 2010 edition of Panama 980, available now in hotels, restaurants and all tourist hot spots across the country absolutely free of charge!]

Being a curious traveler in an exotic place you’ve never been before can be a jarring experience if you don’t know where to go and what to do. With such a wide array of activities, places and events going on in your tourist destination of choice at any given time, sometimes the lesser-known-and- infinitely-satisfying options pass under your activity radar, much to your regret when you find out about them a moment too late.

From party boats to salsa dancing, to drinking frozen margaritas in leather seats at your local movie theater to MC battles, live art at bars and theater performances in your language, I hope you’re ready to dive head-first into nights you’ll never forget!

One of the things my mom made sure to include in my social survival kit at a very young age was the ability to dance basic salsa. Salsa is, of course, an inherently Latin American style of music full of energy, chorus lines and thunderous horn sections. Since Panama is home to one of the greatest representatives of the genre (lookin’ at you, Ruben Blades), there are several bars and restaurants that offer genuinely fun classes in friendly, social atmospheres.

It’s not like a regular salsa dance lesson in the sense that you’re already in a dance floor working it with other strangers just as eager to learn, but the upside is that you get a real taste of the local flavor in what Panamanians like in their music and, since in many instances you’re often paired up with other people in your lesson and constantly change partners as the 2-3 hour lesson progresses, it’s a great place to meet people.

Your best bet to turn yourself into a lean, mean salsa machine, hop in a cab and go to Bohío Florencia in Vía España. Classes are every Thursday from 6-10pm, and only $3 per lesson.

Now that you’ve acquired dancing feet, it’s only appropriate that you find a place to premiere them. Enter… “The Ocean Party!”

This exhilarating, one-of-a-kind experience sounds off kilter when I write it, but it gels in a eerily bizarre manner. The premise is simple: Approximately every other Saturday night at 8pm, the sexy Fantasía del Mar sets sail to traverse the Panama Bay in an open air nightclub atmosphere where you and up to 400 other party animals can dance to your hearts’ content, rockin’ the boat (quite literally) to varied music provided by the resident DJ. Pop, Salsa, Merengue, Electronica, Hip Hop and more are laid down, and the all-night open bar will make sure to give you enough liquid courage to take on the Kraken itself.

The beautiful Panama City skyline serves as a background for the on-board shenanigans at the top level of this three-floor vessel, and if you get hungry at any point of the 3 hour ride along Panama’s shores there is food available on the middle floor, inside an air-conditioned lounge/restaurant area where you can eat and drink whilst engaging in drunken conversation with your friends… and strangers, if you play your cards right.

Fantasía del Mar is available for booking by calling Mrs. Melva Quintero at 209-2009, 66095120 or e-mailing her your name and contact info. Going off to sea for a night of wanton debauchery will set you back $25/person, but when you have so much to look forward to, it seems a very small price to pay. You may also check departure dates by visiting their website!

After such a wild night out on the ocean, you’ll want to pamper yourself. Everyone likes to go to Spas and the like, but I mean, let’s be real! There are spas back home. The only difference is you won’t understand what’s coming out of your pedicurist’s mouth half the time. The question is where can a lovely tourist such as yourself have a “time out” that involves doing absolutely nothing? Well, let me present a concept that will most definitely blow your mind: Going to the movies… V.I.P. style.

Imagine if you will, a stadium-seating movie theater where seats are leather reclining chairs with extra padding, able to recline back to the point of being practically horizontal. Add to this the option of calling a waiter from the comfort of your seat via usher button, who will take your order of anything in the theater’s gourmet menu as well as regular movie-going fare like popcorn and candy.

Beverages are not limited to sodas and water, either; behold a large selection of cocktails, mixed drink, national and imported beers at reasonable prices. You may pay in cash or credit/debit card and in 10 minutes flat your waiter will bring you your order, placed in the convenient glass tray located on the right arm of your seat. Don’t worry about the waiter not being able to find you and running away with your grilled chicken sandwich, though! Each seat is numbered, pre-selected by you at the time of ticket purchase.

The V.I.P. movie theaters are a premium service of established movie theater chains, so you can be sure you’ll always have the latest and greatest of Hollywood and elsewhere. Humongous, 3D-ready movie screens and mind-numbing sound complete the V.I.P. movie experience.

There are two options for the V.I.P. experience in Panama City. First is Extreme Planet, located in Avenida Balboa. Tickets are $6 per person, with the convenience of Irish-themed Bennigan’s Restaurant, arcade, bowling alley and more. For $10 per person though, Cinepolis gives you a waiting lounge, gourmet meals and admittedly more comfortable seats and overall atmosphere. Get your V.I.P. on at Cinepolis, in the top floor of the Multiplaza Mall in Punta Pacífica.

In reality there is much more to do outside of these picks, but sadly there isn’t enough space to talk about all of them. I am, however, give you a few quick bites of different bars around the city that host interesting, unique shows:

• Relic – located in Casco Viejo, below what is known as the backpacker’s choice Luna’s Castle hostel, hosts the very popular Live Art Thursdays starting at 8pm. A Panamanian artist paints a piece live during the course of the night and is put for a silent auction. Great tunes, great drinks and great atmosphere Thursdays or otherwise, with concerts and special events all year round!
• La Musa de Chai – in the heart of Vía Argentina in front of HSBC bank is the liveliest little nook in the thriving cultural area. Home of fun events such as Drink n’ Draw, Open Mic, monthly Gallery Nights where brand new photography and painting exhibits adorn the café’s walls, La Musa de Chai is the place to be when you’re looking for something different. There’s also a menu full of Puerto-Rican flavor for your enjoyment.
• Theatre Guild of Ancon – the oldest and only English-speaking theater house in Panama City, the Theatre Guild of Ancon is celebrating its 60th season in a daring fashion, starting off with a modern adaptation of Charles Dickens’ “Great Expectations” (which I very proudly wrote and directed!), follow by the third season of the mega popular “Improv8” show, an improvisation show that encourages audience participation. Donations are $10 per show, and well worth your while.

The night is yours… and now, you have options to choose how to conquer it!

I’m sure you can relate; for as long as there’s been people on this Earth, there has always been a power struggle for social dominance and, more often than not, the trenches are red-hot with the efforts of two recurring characters who I’m sure you’ve encountered before or currently enjoy their company: The Asshole and The Douchebag. You can find these two anywhere in the world, at any time and at any place no matter what sector of society you find yourself in because these concepts, dear reader, are sadly universal. Why am I writing about these two, you ask? Why waste my prose in such a topic when I could be talking about peaches, LSD, the mythology of Star Wars or something just as trivial but arguably far more interesting? Because I’m an asshole and will do what I want anyway.

So, yes. I’m an asshole. The first time I realized this was over lunch in a cute outdoors restaurant in Bocas del Toro many years ago. I will not tell you what exactly happened because I’m a tease like that, but it took a really good friend of mine to scream this at me from across the table at some point between eating my fish and paying the bill. Of course, at the moment it baffled me but, in retrospect, I deserved it. I really did. So, as I write this today many years later and with the experience self-awareness provides, I can tell you with great amount of property what an asshole is and, by proxy, what a douchebag is. How can I spot a douchebag when I see one, though? What gives me the right to break down what a douchebag is when I’ve just declared myself an asshole? Ahh, I thought you’d never ask.

From Wikipedia:

In Greek mythology, Nemesis (in Greek, Νέμεσις), also called Rhamnousia/Rhamnusia (“the goddess of Rhamnous“) at her sanctuary at Rhamnous north of Marathon, was the spirit of divine retribution against those who succumb to hubris, vengeful fate personified as a remorseless goddess. The name Nemesis is related to the Greek word νέμειν, meaning “to give what is due”. The Romans equated the Greek Nemesis as Invidia (Aronoff 2003).

Nemesis is now often used as a term to describe one’s worst enemy, normally someone or something that is the exact opposite of oneself but is also somehow similar. For example, Professor Moriarty is frequently described as the nemesis of Sherlock Holmes.

In everyday society, a nemesis is defined as a righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. I’m sure everyone has their personal nemesis, as strong a word as it is. As it often is with great rivalries, one of their poignant traits is the fact that, even though they have stark, opposite views on whatever struggle they have, in the end they are very much alike. Professor Moriarty is intelligent, cunning and packs a punch, just like Sherlock Holmes. Batman and the Joker are both incredibly smart sociopaths with views on how the world should be that are opposites, but just as absolute. The asshole and the douchebag are, for all intents and purposes, quite alike: their egos are unmatched, they’re arrogant, often think they’re right about everything, are stubborn, thick and, more often than not, lovable rouges. No matter how much of a dick he/she can be, you can’t help but keep coming back to them. “So then, you asshole,” you must be asking yourself, “what’s the difference between you and a douchebag, if you’re so alike?”  Well, simple: Unlike the douchebag, the asshole is always honest.

The asshole carries an imperative sense of self-awareness that he uses on the world around him. An asshole is such because he will be honest with you, no matter what. No matter where, when, how or with who, and often he needs no reasons as to “why” other than it being in his nature to be honest and not care how you’re going to take such honesty. This is tied to political correctness, whereas many people don’t say what they mean or don’t act like they would really like, the asshole has a reckless abandon that allows him to have a lot of freedom in simply not caring about how his surroundings react to his actions. He is totally aware of this, though. he knows what he’s doing and is aware of the impact his actions will cause. Sometimes assholes like to see it happen. Sometimes, assholes like to watch the world burn. An agent of chaos, if you will.

The douchebag is not an agent of chaos, though. While a d-bag’s behavior parallels that of my kind, there is a crutch: he is not honest. In some cases with his surroundings, in other cases with himself but the douche is not truthful. Often scared and with insecurities due to lack of self-awareness. Can the douchebag turn into an asshole? Sure. A more appropriate question would be if a douche can become self-aware. I’d like to think so. Shit, I sure hope so. While the asshole is dangerous because he will point to the pink elephant in the room while no one else will, the douchebag won’t even see the elephant to begin with, yet continue his behavior. The whole “pink elephant” analogy works because everyone knows its there. What happens when you bring someone in that can’t even see it? What happens when he’s oblivious to it?

There are times where people activate their inner assholes. Their inner douchebags. Everybody has a little bit of both. If you think you’re so righteous, then think about every time you’ve gone out with someone and dumped them for someone else. Every time you’ve taken a proverbial crap on someone just because you don’t like them. Treating people that have done wrong by you like crap. Hell, ignoring the fact you’ve screwed someone over and talking to them like it never happened is an asshole-ish thing to do. I guess that the difference would be if you were aware of what you were doing or not. Do you know you’re treating someone like crap? Congratulations… you’re being an asshole! Are you wondering why X person gives you shitty looks while you’re stealing their Wheaties? Well, dude… douchey douche-douche.

If I look at my output on this site for 2009, I notice that I’ve had a lot of issues with the society I’m in. For some reason it seems that I’m bitter about how people view and treat me, and in turn treat each other. Understandable, I suppose; as much as both you and I would like to think otherwise, I have a heart and even though it often takes a lickin’, it keeps on tickin’. Being an asshole (if you’re into labels) is, in a way, my defense mechanism against society’s transgressions. I suppose that the less I care, the less the people around me can hurt me. The less it can affect me, what people do and how they act. While most people build walls around a fragile heart, I drop the walls and make my heart stronger than what can be thrown at it. Of course, it’s a work in progress and I’m positive I really like that, for better or worse. I’d rather be aware it hurts when it does than be oblivious to it, in much the same way that I prefer being an asshole than a douchebag. I wonder how douchebags cope with things. I could conclude that ignorance, a blissful feeling for sure, allows the douche to not feel a thing when need be. Ahh, ignorance. I wish for it sometimes. Like a good piece of chocolate, something to indulge in every now and then.

Indulging in the topic further then, it would be interesting to know how the asshole and the douche are seen in society, specially in a society like mine. I don’t have extensive douchebag experience but I can tell you that more often than not douchebags attract other douchebags. It happens with everyone that’s like-minded… if you like toy cars, you’ll most likely connect with people who like toy cars. In the same way, a person who sees things a certain way will fraternize with those who share his views. I don’t know if the people associated with me on a regular basis qualify as assholes… I think they’re awesome, but maybe I’m being oblivious to it. A douchebag, if you will. I feel like this has come out as highly partisan, but I hope that you can see the mirror-image I would like you to put on this since, even though I know what an asshole is like, I cannot tell you for sure what a douchebag is. I can just sense them, like we’re Highlanders. Since we’re alike then, make your own conclusions.

I would like to end this piece leaving you with this: what do you think of this? what’s your stance? How will you treat an asshole the next time you see one? What about a douchebag? Questions, questions. I’m putting a lot of faith in you lately, dear reader, because like any true asshole I want to be honest with you when I tell you that I want to believe in you, and someone has to make the first step to establish trust. This is me taking the first step.

Originally posted 2009-10-23 13:19:27.

When you live in a cramped, hectic city where it seems that there’s always something happening and there’s not a moment to rest, the yearning for slower, calmer days slithers in unknowingly, creeping up behind you until it’s all you can think of. When there’s an opportunity to let it all go away, to pause and bask in the tranquility of days that appear to be standing still, after dealing with the noise of city life for so long, the only option is “go.” Whether you’re in Tokyo, Paris, New York or any other metropolis, the feeling of being eaten alive by the freight train of modern life is universal. But when you’re in Panama City, unlike other great modern cities, there are affordable and nearby options that will take it all away. For that purpose, let’s talk about Pedasí, deep in the Azuero Peninsula of the Republic of Panama.

You’ll excuse me if this is a somewhat personal piece.

Allow me to tell you a little bit about the state of mind I was in when I decided to venture out to Pedasi for this piece, to be embraced by the candid hospitality of the excellent folks running the Casita Margarita Boutique Hotel. I feel that it’ll help drive my point across as to why not just Pedasi, but also Casita Margarita were crucial to my new-found fondness of the place. But first, let me tell you a little bit about Pedasi itself. Consulting my Personal Lord and Savior, I got this tidbit:

Human settlement in the Azuero peninsula where Pedasí is located dates back anywhere from 11,000 years to 4500 years ago based on pre-Columbian artifacts and other archaeological evidence recovered from various sites on the peninsula. Spanish colonizers arrived in the 16th century, largely wiping out or displacing existing indigenous populations.

The district of Pedasí was created in 1840, when Panama was still tenuously united with Colombia. At the time, it was a division of the County of Los Santos (today the province of Los Santos), in the Province of Panama (which covered all of present-day Panama, except for the provinces of Veraguas and Bocas del Toro). The population of Pedasí in 1845 was 701 inhabitants.

Since then, the land of the Pedasí district has been used extensively for cattle farming; the cultivation of sorghum, corn, cantaloupe and watermelon; and the coastal villages support a small fishing industry.

A new industry has settled in as of late, the reason why I went out there in the first place: tourism. With the tourism boom that’s exploded in Panama for the last five or some-odd years, it’s not until now that foreigners are looking into the Azuero Peninsula, historically the cradle of Panamanian civilization, to visit, surf and retire. Located deep into the Pacific Coast of the country, Pedasi is home to a myriad of beaches, many of them great for surfing, some of the finest sports fishing in the world and other attractions such as the beautiful Isla Iguana. Because of this, a few small hotels, hostels and inns have opened to cater to the ever-increasing tourist traffic the peaceful, quiet town is receiving.

In retrospect, heading out there in the state I was in made me appreciate the trip more than if I had been in better condition to travel. My car, the legendary Red Bean, was in the shop for repairs. I had already postponed the trip for a couple of days just so I could have the Bean take us there since, in the end, it would’ve been cheaper: a roughly four-hour drive from Panama City down the Inter-American Highway leads you to the entrance of the Azuero Peninsula. From there you’ll pass the city of Chitré, and the town of Los Santos. Thirty minutes or so in you’ll eventually reach the world-famous town of Las Tablas, arguably the most popular Carnival destination. Once in Las Tablas, you’re in for the home stretch: approximately 30 minutes out of Las Tablas you’ll reach the quiet town of Pedasi, right by the coast. Since the Bean wasn’t ready and I was growing increasingly more frustrated with Panama City and the proverbial bullshit that goes with it, we decided to head out to the Panama Bus Terminal and head on out the public transport way.

It is recommended to take the bus early, because you’re in for a long trip. There are no buses that will take you straight to Pedasi; instead, you’re instructed to take an $8-fare charter bus to Las Tablas, and from there take another $4-fare bus for the last stretch to Pedasi. Be forewarned, though! The last Las Tablas-Pedasi bus leaves at 4PM. After that, taxis are the only means of transportation, and they’ll ring you up anywhere between $12-18, depending on who you ask.

So here’s a little introspection: my state of mind was one that could only be compared to riding a perfect wave. I’m not a surfer by any stretch, but the analogy works perfectly. I met a very lovely girl some time before the trip went down, and she gave me many gifts which I will always be grateful for. Not material gifts, mind you; after a long, strung-out period where it seemed to me no girl would bet on me for X, Y, or Z reasons, as luck would have it I found a woman who is daring, brave, beautiful and was not scared of my lack of self-control. It was a breath of fresh air, this wave. Of course, like all great things, this relationship had a due date in the form of a plane ticket back to Europe. Just when I thought that because of this banana peel she wouldn’t bet on me though, the most unbelievable thing happened: she went all-in, stripping everything off the proverbial bullshit. There was no tomorrow, and I hadn’t been this genuinely happy in a very long time; this made me dread the due date with twice the intensity, and as we got on the bus and waited for the journey to Pedasi to start, I chose then and there to be utterly selfish and wish that time would stop just so I could get punch-drunk on this. I didn’t want it to end, as childish as it sounds.

With that, the bus finally backed up and headed out to the pitch-black highway. There were many things that I learned on this trip, but the first thing that Pedasi made perfectly clear is that sometimes, if you truly wish for something to happen, the universe conspires to make it come true.

Pedasi is quiet and charming to the point of feeling like you’re in another world. A more tranquil, more serene place far removed from everything the city slicker is used to. The townsfolk have a laid-back attitude, never lock the doors to their homes and carry on their days with grace and not a worry in the world. If in Chitré it’s evident who is from Panama City by the way they drive and move about, in Pedasi they stick out like sore thumbs. It somehow forces strangers to keep themselves chilled out as to not disrupt the tranquility of the place, an unspoken rule that everyone follows, whether you’re from town or not. It made for a rather intimate atmosphere, a fragile tranquility that everyone knew shouldn’t be disrupted… which brings me to Casita Margarita.

Established in 2008, Casita Margarita is a five-bedroom boutique inn located right on the main street of Pedasi, about two minutes past the entrance of the town. As legend has it, the two-story house used to belong to a local carpenter; the developers decided to name the inn “Margarita,” after the carpenter’s grandmother. Do you know the feeling you get when you walk into a house and it feels inviting, warm, lived in? That I-dunno-what that you perceive when you feel at home somewhere? Well, this place has it in spades. I couldn’t, for the life of me, figure out what made Margarita such a delight to be in. An indescribable sense of comfort and serenity, like a mother’s bosom or some other transcendental Feng Shui shit permeated every hallway, every chair, the walls, the wooden floors, the beautiful dining room, the second-floor lounge area, the lush vegetation surrounding it… it’s as if we stepped into a vortex where time would slow down and, if we really stopped tracking it, reach a much-needed halt.

The folks running the hotel are some of the coolest Gringos (and Costa-Rican!) I’ve ever met. They make the experience a hundred times better due to the fact that they take the “personal attention” shtick to heart. We felt like we were staying at a friends’ house, albeit with utterly beautiful decor and some badass cooking. Since the hotel is small, it creates a sense of fellowship that goes perfectly in tune with the tranquil mood Pedasi sets in. All rooms have air conditioning, bathroom, closet, satellite TV and wireless internet access. The lounge area on the second floor has a pretty healthy selection of books and magazines, as well as a balcony with a great view of Main Street and hammocks to gently swing the days away in comfort and bliss. Gourmet meals are available on Saturday nights for both guests and anyone who wants to drop by, but there’s limited seating so remember to get there early! The hotel rates include breakfast, so don’t fret about it. Also, the awesome Chef Andres can prepare special meals for guests any night of the week.

If you’re looking for different options to eat, there are all sorts of restaurants in the surrounding area, from Italian to Panamanian. There are even a couple of juice bars open during the day, along with the famous Angela’s Restaurant, which serves some of the best sandwiches I’ve ever had in. My. Life. Angela’s is highly recommended, right next to the Centro Comercial Pedasi (don’t let the name fool you; it’s not a gargantuan mall by any means), off of Main Street. You can’t miss it.

The staff at Casita Margarita will help you in anything you need, whether it is organizing a fishing trip or finding out more about what there is to do in Pedasi and the destinations you should hit while you’re there. You’ll be hard-pressed to leave the hotel though; forget about the rooms, since they’re cozy as hell. They have a magnet quality tuned into my ass that completely takes over if I let it. Once out on the main road, you can venture out to Isla Iguana, Isla Cañas (a popular turtle-nesting ground), any of the beaches located just a few minutes away by car, and other secret goodies. If you know who to ask, they’ll spill the beans on the several waterfalls in the surrounding area. Wherever it is you go, don’t worry about not being able to find your way back to Casita Margarita; just walk until you see the prettiest house on Main Street.

Be sure to swing by their website for more pictures of the hotel, check out the tours and make your reservations. I’d like to take this opportunity to thank Cailey, Casey and Andres for all of their warm hospitality, care and love for “Entourage.” Kiki and I had a blast during our stay. I’m just a little sorry we couldn’t enjoy more of Pedasi than we did; the problem with time standing still is that, before you know it, it’s time to head back to Panama City! Please, dear reader, don’t let this happen to you and make sure you venture out and explore the beauty of Pedasi. Walk around. Meet people. Have some mangos; they’re delicious and they fall off trees all the time with the right amount of shakes. Oh, and if you need someone to kindly tell you what time it is when you’re too deep in the tranquility to tell for yourself, let the kind folks at Casita Margarita help you.

Originally posted 2009-09-21 22:31:11.

Panama is a prime example of how what one person does will inadvertently affect everyone else that lives with him in a society. Since the place is so small, the ripples someone’s action makes can be felt in practically every level of life here, and I’ll give you an example of this right now: I saw on the news this morning that the there’s a labor strike starting today with all teachers and professors of public schools regarding a lack of satisfaction concerning a pay raise they’ve been discussing with the government for well over a month now. The specifics are, in typical blog journalist fashion, subjective and inconclusive to me but it seems that negotiations, even though there was an agreed sum that both parties could live with (a whopping $90 raise, which is a little less than half the offer the teacher unions were gunning for, a sum which came close to almost $250 if I remember correctly) someone decided they don’t like the deal they struck and went to the only way they know how to be heard. That’s the solution to a lot of the communication problems between the people and it’s government: go out to the streets and protest about whatever ails you no matter how big or small it is. I notice that the people in the worker unions, the National University’s student movements and these other smaller groups can never be happy. They have a prejudice against the government that I believe stems from both the inherent affinity of the human being to question authority and the absurd things their parent told them when they were kids, stuff that was said out of spite and hatred for a government that never had time to take care of them. There’s this one guy, Saúl Mendez I believe is him name but I could be wrong… this guy goes on RCM (our “news network,” of sorts) in shows where politicians, scholars, businessmen and other people come in to talk and discuss the current events ailing the country and the world; every time he goes on he has this embedded animosity against everything anybody on the panel that’s wearing a suit would say, and even though said businessman or even politician is right on their point, however obvious and ridiculous it is he will always be against them, playing dirty by doing personal attacks in this passive, condescending tone that I loathe to no end. Some of these people are frustrating to watch because of their obvious lack of vision on a general scale and crystal clear agenda to go against the government not because what they are proposing on any given subject is good or bad for you but because it’s the government and since they’re the government they always lie and they will always want to fuck the people over. A lot of these guys are like that, and whether their ridiculous demands are met or not they will still go out on strike anyway because they’ve said so before.

These strikes and protests bring pro’s and con’s to the table, as does everything. Continuing the example of today, I got to work earlier today because since the public school teachers are on strike then they didn’t open the schools, which means that the buses don’t have to make as many stops and there doesn’t need to be more buses than there already there… voilá, less traffic on the streets and therefore I get to the office sooner than I thought. People have the right to fight for what’s theirs and I completely support it but this is the part I don’t find much sense in: the student unions of the country’s National University (la Universidad de Panamá) will take any excuse imaginable to close down the street in front of the main entrance to the facilities called Via Transístmica and not only cause INSANE traffic jams, but also vandalize and destroy private property that’s not theirs. They’ll do the whole burning tire and trash on fire thing in the middle of the closed-off street until the cops show up, 20 of them in a small, raggedy wagon car armed to the teeth like they were handling terrorists (which they are, mind you) with smoke and gas bombs, as well as rubber bullets to subdue the children masked using their own t-shirts to cover up their faces. What continues is a Mexican Stand-off between the two factions, the cops trying to disperse the felons who have ran back into university grounds, private property and therefore untouchable by the troops… but they still shoot them from outside so they can calm the fuck down. Then the kids complain about police brutality… fuck, there have been times where innocents trying to pass by the Transistmica get stoned out and sometimes their car windows have been broken by some smartass getting his kicks off of damaging stuff that isn’t his. Not just car windows, either: people have been beaten up, mugged and even raped once or twice while these riots happen and it’s that “put up or shut up” attitude of both the workers’ and student unions the one that’s going to push us further into the ground.

If you’re not news savvy/Panamanian, it’s as good a time as any to mention that there’s going to be a referendum in October to decide the fate of the Panama Canal. There’s a plan to modernize it by making the lock wider so that it can take in bigger boats and more at a time; the Panama Canal Commission is 100% behind this plan, so technical and downright mind-numbing that even though they have tried their darnedest to educate the people by setting up information posts in malls as well as making the project’s headquarters a place open to the public, phone numbers you can call, e-mails you can write to and a whole bunch of other ways where the Panamanian citizen can get information on the project, there’s been a real animosity to the whole thing because of the people’s distrust of the government. Martin Torrijos’ rule over Panama has been very hit-and-miss, stumbling many a time but ultimately getting done what’s best for the country. The Panama Canal modernization is no exception: the zeitgeist points to the fact that they don’t trust the government because if they vote “yes” on the project they would be handing over 5 BILLION DOLLARS to have the project made. Even though the ACP says that those funds come from the income the Panama Canal has been receiving ever since it came back to Panamanian hands, there are reports that say that the statement is not true. The same people who say that also say that it’s not necessary to modernize the Canal yet. I don’t know about you, but the Panama Canal is the only really good thing we’ve going for ourselves and we’re doing pretty good at administering it. There’s a serious risk of our beloved Canal to stop being a competitor when you have people planning similar, more modern projects in various points of the continent and if we don’t get with the times we’ll loose our one real pride and joy… the only thing that’s giving us any real money. I don’t know whether to attribute it to distrust or ignorance, but voting “no” just because the government is saying you should vote “yes” is rather childish and moronic. Of course, voting “yes” because your government tells you it’s good for you is just as bad… both instances are repulsive, more so due to the fact that a lot of people have chosen to think in either of these 2 ways. The elections are going to be insane… this thing’s big, and it’ll cause big riots.

Nobody seems to be able to compromise, here. It’s like we’re children as a society, and the statement seems appropriate considering we’re merely over 100 years old as a country. Acting like children is what we do.

Originally posted 2006-08-09 09:46:03.

The Armed Forces Network is the television branch of the Armed Forces Radio, which is the U.S military’s official radio channel. The organization’s origins date as far back as the 1940’s, a few years prior to World War II; this wasn’t a government initiative but rather local bases in different parts of Europe trying to send a little piece of home to the soldiers who were preparing for the inevitable invasion of a Nazi-occupied Europe, sending news and recorded radio shows of various interests, from soap operas to Buck Rogers and music. The first official branch of what would become the AFRS (Armed Forces Radio Service, founded in 1942) was in this very country, naturally in the Panama Canal Zone under station PCAN… it would later be swallowed up by the AFRS and in 1952, when the television branch of the organization was created then it became the AFRTS, or the Armed Forces Network (AFN) for short. How original.

In the 1960’s a lot of stuff happened, but what’s most important to this history lesson is that the Panama Canal command went through some shifting and during the mix-up the AFN became the Southern Command Network (SCN) with both TV and radio channels broadcasting 24 hours a day, 7 days a week from Fort Clayton, right in the outskirts of Panama City. The SCN would also broadcast to troops stationed in Honduras during the late 80’s up until 1999, when they closed operations as part of the Torrijos-Carter deals that had the U.S give back the Panama Canal to us… so lets see: SCN’s first television broadcast was on May 9th, 1956 while it closed its doors December 31st, 1999. Not bad, considering it was the first TV channel available in the country; ironically, it was all in English so everybody that wasn’t military couldn’t understand a word of what they were watching… the broadcast schedule was as follows:

I’m done with the history lesson, but if you would like to know more about the SCN’s (as well as television in Panama) history you might want to click here; it’s in Spanish, but it’s very thorough and worth finding a translator. Anyway, my point is this: If you read this and many of my previous rants on the subject of politics or Panamanian history you’ll notice that the United States and us are intricately linked, whether we like it or not. I’ve come to realize that it’s a very touchy subject for generations past in the sense that people’s opinions concerning the U.S are very polarized, depending on who you talk to: my father, for example, is anti-American. Well, let me rephrase that because that’s not entirely true; he’s very resentful in regards to America and it’s government, specially if we talk about the 1989 invasion. He was shot at, treated like a criminal and was almost sent to jail along with my mom and that, along with the virtual genocide armed troops unleashed on the district of Chorrillo have left him with somewhat of a sore spot in regards to them. He gets to the point where it’s almost scary how anti-military he is and sometimes we have these conversations where I don’t know if he’s serious or just kidding:

Dad: “Hey Robert, guess what I saw on the news today?”

Rob (shrugging): “Whatcha see?”

Dad: “We took our 4 more soldiers in Iraq today.”

Rob: “Who’s ‘we?’”

Dad: “THE FREEDOM FIGHTERS, Robert!”

Rob (confused, nervously snickering): “huh?”

Dad: “The gringos went in there for NOTHING and now they’re getting spray-canned like cockroaches!”

Rob: “Oh, God…”

Dad: “They’re all cold-blooded murderers, the lot of them! They don’t care about anyone! It was about time someone put them in their place and now they’re being killed off one by one in a meaningless war by an enemy much more capable than they are with their bombs and tanks… THE FREEDOM FIGHTERS, Robert!!!”

Rob: “It’s not the soldiers’ fault, though…”

Dad (out of his chair, arms blazin’): “They’re all coked up and all they can think about is ‘KILL, KILL, KILL!’ and that fucking Bush, it’s his fault! He’s made them that way and he’s sending them out to die for oil! Ridiculous! Hopefully they’ll realize soon they lost the war… they lost the war and they never should’ve gone there.”

Rob: “Uh-huh…”

Dad: “Did Bush’s father ever do anything to help the THOUSANDS of families that lost loved ones in 1989? Tell me, Robert! No, you couldn’t tell me because you were too small… almost 3,000 people dead and a whole community reduced to rubble and for what? Noriega wasn’t even near Chorrillo… they’re assassins, the scum of the earth! To this day, Robert! To this day no one’s ever mentioned what happened… I almost went to jail because of them. I got shot at because of them!!! I will never forget!”

This drives my mom up the frickin’ walls. His limitless supply of resentment and paranoia know no bounds, and whereas my mom has always liked American culture and the lifestyle and what not… quite a couple huh?

The Southern Command Network was probably the TV station I watched the most as a kid. It was the only station growing up that I could listen to programs in English and learn the accent, and the channel was packed to the gills with the most excellent cartoon lineup I have ever experienced, all in English. I was like a kid in a candy shop, watching stuff like the Thundercats, the Visionaries, MASK, honest-to-God awesome Looney Toons, the Centurions, He-Man and the Masters of the Universe… hell, they even had American Gladiators, Nickelodeon’s GUTS, and shows like Star Trek and Get Smart! I also saw my first movie with my dad in the history of my life when I was 5: Sergio Leone’s “The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly.” If you can’t tell already, I have pretty fond memories of the channel. As I grew up and my tastes in television were increasing in terms of scope I’d stay late and watch the late night talk shows that I’d be hooked on even to this day; first was the Tonight Show with Jay Leno, then was the Late Show with David Letterman and after that they aired the Late Late Show with some old dude who’s name I don’t remember but later it was replaced by Craig Kilborn. After them shows, I’d get Star Trek: The Next Generation. All in all it was fun, entertaining TV with stuff I was sure I wouldn’t find anywhere else whether it was local access or cable… It was just better. This leads me to my next point…

I will touch on this in tomorrow’s editorial but I’d like to point something out: whenever December 20th comes around (that’s the date when the Armed Forces blitzed the capital “looking for Noriega” in 1989) and the news crews take to the streets to ask the public if things in Panama are better now that the U.S is gone, the responses are very polarized… the subject draws many parallels to the way we do politics in this country or in any country for that matter: you’re either with us or against us. Many people think that the U.S should come back. Others pray to the Lord every day for ridding us of the U.S military but personally, I see 2 things: the Panama Canal is running just as great with us as when they had it, but the Panama Canal Zone areas are 5 times dirtier and unkept than they were when the troops were here. I suppose that for those who favor the notion of the U.S taking over again is because they put things in order and aren’t lazy or sloppy like we Panamanians are; which kind of explains why many Panamanians would like their big brother to come back and take care of them like in the good ol’ days. All I know is that the day SCN closed its broadcast a little part of me died. To quote the commercials the station would put come Friday and all through Sunday, from the Porto Diao Headquarters in the Town With No Name…

HAVE A NICE WEEKEND!!!

Originally posted 2006-09-22 12:45:40.